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rise​/​away

by G. Mervine

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1.
undertow 04:05
Hold on tight a- gainst the undertow Wheels of time are whining low Here I lost my bearing the Sea a darkness blaring Alarm bells break go or never know Islands writhing pierced by ancient pain Life to lose and only death to gain Help me hear that ringing the Surge in silence singing Holy words, gnostic refrain --- Feel that current washing undertow Down I bid my soul to go Upon a point fixating in Solitary waiting for Union, poet, I may never know Not the skin, beat the hollow inside Where I bid my soul to hide There I went crazy Afraid and dormant lazy One way out and burn what stays behind Please, my dear, hear me out Last night I crumbled under doubt That I just can’t be Happy like you ask of me You know those times I packed to run away To find the notes, the words, some light of day ---- Please, my dear, help me out Cage this voice, chain this shout Cause I could just be Patient like you ask of me Built a wall, lost within, What of me, somewhere, remains?
2.
come find me 04:23
Let my silence serve to say that I’m afraid Lest my tongue speak out what’s on my mind Never felt our love so far away ‘Spite your hands deep pressin’ upon mine (‘Spite your hands deep pressin’ upon mine) Gentle kisses dropping on my face Stitch my heart and help me toe the line Teach my feet the steps we used to dance When dancing meant our souls would ever laugh (When dancing meant our souls would ever laugh) Come find me In my note I wrote “would not be long” When what I meant was “babe, I can’t go on.” Come find me There’s nothing worse than no control The shot it fires it rings it blows a hole My body aches and there ain’t no help comin’ Can you hear my time ticking away Heavy grows and clotting up the rhymes Got so high this falling so far to go Grasping for pieces too sharp to hold (Grasping for pieces too sharp to hold) Come find me In my note I wrote “would not be long” When what I meant was “babe, I can’t go on.” Come find me There’s nothing worse than no control The shot it fires it rings it blows a hole My body aches and there ain’t no one comin’
3.
Mars Once Had An Atmosphere I’ve been to this place They’re all floating around The infinite space A hole in the ground The Hubble-like vision Alert with the dawn Sows the division Quartered and drawn I go to this place With limbs on the floor The sun has no face The moon is no door The dreamer is dreaming What did I want more? The flowers are lying Dried up on the floor Hear this sad city Rage up out of bed Where no one is thinking What’s in my head I need you to see me The depth of this hole Rummage the mire Beware of my soul
4.
rise/away 05:23
Stay with me this night Your talking keeps me warm against the fright Waves are crashing hard upon the shore The boats are bobbing ready to unmoor Into nothing goes The past is yet to come Whether it be death or rising sun It won’t be a light I see Just a speck of dark upon the sea Into nothing goes That I may rise My God what joy sweet waters in my hair And I won’t think of them no more No I won’t think of them sailing wide Be-brave-nothing, waiting us, at the world’s end Hold me close this night Give me a reprieve from my fight I am living long on bended knee Calcified the joints the stagger be Into nothing goes Where are those eyes From which the beauty tumbled forth like rain? I don’t find the love no more No I don’t find the love, it is wanting, In the words, awaiting us, at the world’s end That I may rise My God what joy sweet waters in my hair And I won’t think of them no more No I won’t think of them sailing wide Be-brave-nothing, awaiting us, at the world’s end
5.
Mover My nights are soundin’ Faded And what’s not found in Paper Is hauling me away Sun high But I don’t see its Glory Mountains be my Story Now I know I’ve got to die OO Oh Am I running out of time? OO Oh Yes you’re running out of time. Break me Love I couldn’t Carry Consuming and Destroy me Faithless in the end Save me The truth I have not Brought forth The song I never Cried out The love I never gave you OO Oh Am I running out of time? OO Oh Yes you’re running out of time.
6.
Am I gonna wait with you Or am I gonna die Thristin’ for that dazzlin’ ocean Drop the match on lies Do I wanna be a sainted someone Holy in whose eyes? Hail! Hail! the King of choked emotion Never quite alive ‘Cause I’ve got a little one she don’t ask what I’ve done I don’t ask what she’s done she’s my little one Deep into my secret stash Gets me high it don’t last Savage heart built to lash Oh wee oh…….. Am I gonna walk with you Steady by your side Down a lonely road with you In a world so wide You bring me joy and peace and comfort Sometimes you break me too But when it’s pain not peace that I desire Your caress won’t do ‘Cause I’ve got a little one She don’t care why I’ve done I don’t care what she’s done She’s my little one Deep into my secret stash Gets me high it don’t last Savage heart built to lash Oh wee oh…….. Tell me is this how it’s gonna be? Lust in my heart gnashin’ rapaciously Not a happy one but can I live unhappily enough for one Who ain’t gonna let his soul get trapped again!
7.
slow loss 03:09
Lately I’ve been soaring in my sleep O’er wires and high above the rooftops and tall trees Maybe I should be more afraid Foundations that I haven’t laid Oh here it comes the sky’s caving again Little harder to feel the faith each time The beauty overwhelming but the words that come don’t rhyme My notebooks guard a burning mind The facts and truths his fury find Help me find the strength once again Alone I’d be a horse slipped of his carriage In forests run and drunken grow at night upon the darkness Madly charge the rise or fall Live to die and risk it all And lay besides the angels of emptiness Darling, put your shaky hands in mine Impossible to know what will be coming down the line Throw aside this heavy load And dance upon the open road Darling take my shaky hands in thine
8.
want it 04:48
Light beneath the bedroom door That slender break in the darkness We were here some times before Turning pages like apartments Soon she’ll fold the leaves together And disappear inside her dreams I don’t know what to say To quell the fury growing wild within her I want it in the evening I want it through the night But I ask myself ‘is it worth the fight?’ I wake up in the morning On the highway think I might But I ask myself, ‘is it worth the fight?’ Bright brown eyes in my rearview Tender hands that cherish me I have not been a constant father My mind turns back repeatedly Take the stars, I give them to you Try to hide my heart’s sick miseries You will receive miracles and blessings And make a thousand furtive plans before you run away In a moment they’ll be sleeping Left alone inside my head Seek my approbation midst the living And admonishments from the dead I’d be the loudest voice in the ovation If she put me down and chased her dreams instead
9.
blown out 05:33
This is my chance You told me to take it Find a way home A future for saving Are we too old For reckless adventure Or are we too young To live with this failure Oh yeah, so comforting Freedom from the suffering Hear the blood as your heart ticks And I send my kiss to your red lips Oh yeah, so comforting End to all the questioning Hear the blood as your heart ticks And I send my kiss to your red lips Look where we are Sailing so high above Into fairy-tales Escape we’ve been dreaming of Might it be right And this love forgiven And might it wrong Be fearless in falling

about

i never lacked the courage/foolishness to walk away from a good thing. then i found love...took me to a place i didn't belong...became a father. did those experiences make me less courageous/foolish? life is so easy to get lost in.

these songs were how i navigated the confusion and uncovered buried impulses. that they sound like rock is revealing. coming up in philadelphia, i played jazz and 'exotic' music from all over the world, with bands like old goats and west philadelphia orchestra. so of course when i moved to the badlands of brazil i began writing rock songs. being away made me long for familiar sounds...things one learns on the strange journey.

most songs were written in campina grande, paraiba between 2013 and 2016 and then finished in langhorne, pennsylvania. chad brown engineered the live drum and horn recordings. everything else was recorded at my house.

para você, meu amor

credits

released September 2, 2018

g. mervine - voices, guitars, bass, drums, percussion and programming (mix/master too).
Frank Rein - trombone
Adam Hershberger - trumpet
Amy Zakar - vioin
Yoomi Kwon - cello

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about

G. Mervine Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

G. Mervine crafts songs that explore the verges of experience, the limits of belief, and the tightropes we dance upon over voids and heartbreak. He is a composer and poet foremost, but also a jazz drummer, a percussionist, and music producer. He founded West Philadelphia Orchestra, has composed for theater and ballet, produced records in Philly and in Brazil, and more... ... more

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